In March 1862, The Christian Recorder, the official magazine of the African Methodist Church, published a rhyme which for the first time in print included the saying that “sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me.”
Ever since it has been retold to children as a means to build resilience against verbal bullying.
In recent times though this old wisdom has been thrown away. Instead, a victim industry has emerged which persuades people that a great injury is done to them if they feel bad after someone speaks to them. It does not matter if the person has spoken innocently or without malice. The only thing that matters is your mental state.
Thus, a new notion was born by one of the first critical race theorists, Mari J Matsuda. In her 1993 book, Words that Wound, she claimed that racist hate speech is “assaultive speech” that inflicts psychological and social harm equivalent to violence.
Last week, the world was shocked by the brutal assassination of Charlie Kirk, a 31-year-old husband and father, whose only crime was that he liked to travel to college campuses and debate people who disagreed with him. Charlie said controversial things but any fair-minded person who watches his debates, which were all broadcast online, can see that he is kind, welcoming and likes the company of others even those he disagrees with.
But Charlie’s intentions were not adequate for the ‘speech is violence’ crowd.
It is hard to comprehend, but what has even been more shocking than Charlie’s unexpected murder, has been the glee that many have expressed about the live execution of a fellow human being. These sick people are not ostracised to the fringes of our society. Hundreds of teachers, nurses, doctors and political commentators have all either minimised, justified or, in the worst cases, celebrated a horrific act of terrorism.
The logic for their inhumane reactions goes something like this. Charlie said things that hurt people’s feelings. Hurting people’s feelings is a violent act. Therefore, violence is a justifiable response.
For those not down the moral dead end of critical race theory and radical feminist scholarship, this is an ethical hellscape.
The first problem is that people’s words are often misinterpreted or misreported. It has been common to see in recent days quotes from Charlie that he never said. For example, he never said that “school shootings” are the price Americans pay to have access to guns.
Others take offence from mere innocent words. Using someone’s incorrect pronouns is now treated in some quarters as equivalent to inflicting grievous bodily harm.
The second is that an ethical system that elevates each individual’s feelings as the supreme concern soon runs into the problem that we can’t all be sovereign at the same time. If you take violent offence to something I say, aren’t I justified to take violent offence at you being upset with me? We can not all be at the centre of the universe and if we try, we will have no ability to cooperate with each other to create a functioning society.
In a harmonious society, you must consider the feelings of others not just your own. Charlie’s courage was most evident in his unapologetic display of his Christian faith. Jesus Christ taught us to do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
Finally, the injury done to me by mere words is at least somewhat in my control. No doubt people feel bad if they lose an argument, are laughed at or insulted. But you can learn to ignore such slights or to turn a bad moment into a positive by becoming stronger from it. Again, as Jesus said you can “turn the other cheek.”
Our modern day “trigger warnings” ignore Christ’s teachings of strength and defiance and instead turn everyone into weaklings with no independent control of their lives. It is a sad existence that fails its own adherents by putting an artificial ceiling on their potential.
The Christian Reader wrote its “sticks and stones” rhyme to its African-American Christian audience during the American civil war. Black Americans still faced slavery, but the tough Christian truths taught by the likes of the Recorder helped build a movement that ended slavery. It culminated in Martin Luther King’s dream that his “four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.”
Unfortunately, we have not lived up to King’s dream with a grievance industry that infantilises people.
The full verse from the Christian Recorder says that “sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me. Unless, of course, you let them.” We should rediscover this old wisdom fast.
